Changes in My Life

I am so excited about this upcoming change in my life. I am about to embark on the greatest journey of my life. I have never been so happy and excited about anything in my life.

Thank you for being the sunshine in my life. I love you so much, my dearest.

Scared of Loving You

Yes, I am scared of loving you. Scared that I might end up hurt again. But in the 17 months that we've known each other, and in the 9 months that we've been in this relationship, you have shown and proven to me unconsciously that I have nothing to be scared about; that we're in this together; that we will be together come what may.

I've said this a thousand times already, and words aren't enough to express what I feel, but... I'm really happy that we've taken steps to reach our future. And I will continue striving to become a better person, for Abie, for our future kids, for you, and most especially, for myself.

I love you. And that is final.

I Loved You Last

There's something so nice about saying that, "I loved you last." It's final. It feels so certain. Life has been more wonderful and colorful since we met over a year ago.

I'm really excited about what lies ahead for us. The happily married with 3 lovely kids part in our lives. Plus the booming business.

I know that whatever happens with us, we'll make it through because we have each other. I love you so much pops.

We'll always have each other, and we'll always be each other's family.

8 days. That's only how long I'm going wait until you get closer to me. I'm quite excited about your upcoming move. I feel like it'll be the start of something good for us. I hope the next month will be good for us as well. I'm nervous about the results in my applications. If I get in, that means that I have my hands full with my schedule. If I don't, that means I'll still end up in that UP campus we both love to hate. LOL.

I'm really glad that we found each other, love.

Pyramid

My current favorite song. It speaks for me, for what I'm feeling for you. I love you so much, sweetie.

PYRAMID
(Charice Pempengco and Iyaz)

Stones, heavy like the love you've shown
Solid as the ground we've known
And I just wanna carry on
We took it from the bottom up
And even in a desert storm
Sturdy as a rock we hold
Wishing every moment froze
Now I just wanna let you know

Earthquakes can't shake us
Cyclones can't break us
Hurricanes can't take away our love

Pyramid, we built this on a solid rock
It feels just like it's heaven's touch
Together at the top (at the top baby), like a pyramid
And even when the wind is blowing
We'll never fall just keep on going
Forever we will stay, like a pyramid

Cold, never ever when you're close
We will never let it fold
A story that was never told
Something like a mystery
And every step we took we've grown
Look how fast the time has flown
A journey to a place unknown
We're going down in history

Like a pyramid girl let me show you
That I love you so much
That we gonna get through
Even when there's storms
I will never go, Ima be the one to keep you safe
Before was our love back it up more than enough
Holding on to one another be the cover when it's rough
Mother nature or disaster won't stop at happy ever after

469

469 days has passed since we first met face-to-face. It's April first today. The start of the day I've been waiting for. There's nothing significant that happened a year ago on this date. But I've been waiting for this day because this is the start for us for making our dreams happen.

Only a few more weeks love and you'll get to be near me soon. I can't wait to be in your arms again. Right where I belong.

Looking Back, Moving Forward

I've never let anyone come this close and no one has reached this far in my life ever. I've never let anyone bring out the best and the worst of me. What you've done to me is really amazing. You've let the best of me out of its shell. You love me as much as I love myself, I think. Nobody has let me cry tears of joy. No one except you. That my love, is one of the things I will always cherish. I have never submitted myself to anyone except to you. You've broken the walls I built.

A long time ago, I promised myself that I won't get married because I don't want to be tied down to anyone. But with you, I can still soar and fly away into the night, and I know you won't chain me but instead, you will just await my return. With you, I can be whoever I want and need to be.

Yes love, our relationship is such a rare breed. That's why I'm so thankful that I finally found you. I now know my true calling - to love you all my life, and to build a happy family with you.

Whatever awaits us at the end of this road we're taking, I know we will stand hand in hand, ready to take on the challenges that await us. Wherever our feet will take us, I know it will be filled with happiness because we're together in all of these.

Every single day of waking up is one step closer to our dreams. And every single day, I am reminded about how much we love each other. I'm no longer afraid of losing you, because it's very clear that we both want each other to reach that happy ending we're working hard for.

Our dreams are very beautiful, my love. We're going to reach the end and be happy. We deserve it, love. At the end of the road, we will be there with our three or four kids.

No one can stop this love we have. No one can break us apart. No one has very clear goals like we do, and no other couple has planned this far, like we do. some plan their marriage, but we've planned our life together.

Words aren't enough to describe what I'm feeling, and words will never be enough for us.

I really love it when we're just silent and looking into each other's eyes. Your eyes, your smile, your lips, and your tocuh say it all.

I love you so much, pops!

My Plans for 2010

1. Build a home with you.
2. Make you smile everyday.
3. Take away your sadness when you are down.
4. Massage you when you are tired.
5. Lie down in your arms and tell you of my dreams about us.
6. Hug you ever so tightly.
7. Kiss you tenderly.
8. Look in your eyes until I fall all over again.
9. Cook for you.
10. Show you how much I love you.
11. Make love to you.
12. Take your breath away.
13. Hold you and never let you go.

I love you so much Pops!

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No Day But Today

This week has been like hell to me. By Friday, I was close to tears and felt like giving up. I feel like the Builders kids do not see me like a teacher, rather, a friend, an ate. That, maybe explains why they always feel close to me, and most of the time, take me for granted during class. They feel like they can get away with their ways.

Juggling two jobs with different fields, being a mom, and trying hard to be a good daughter and sister is a hard thing. One thing I'm great at though, that's loving you my sweetheart.

I discovered a peaceful place to be, that may be very well my sanctuary. Albeit the noise of those high school students, it was pretty peaceful. Thank you for taking me there, listening to me, and holding my hand through this hard time.

I burst into tears as we were about to get out of the car. The pain of having to part again was something I didn't want to feel once more. But it felt so right to be in your arms. I loved that feeling when I was crying and you were holding me tightly and kissing away my tears. I felt so loved. Something I haven't felt for a long time until you came into my life and loved me.

I promise you, love, that I will just hang on. I won't give in, I won't give up. And I'll be there with you at the end of the road.

I am forever your wife, your lover, your partner, your better half, the greatest love you'll ever have.

March 28, 2009. Our first date. That was the day I told myself that it would be the last time I'd take the risk and put my heart in the hands of someone who will have the power to hurt me. I gave it a shot. My last shot. Because I promised myself that if this won't work out, I can settle with what I have - Abie.

But you showed me and made me feel that I was worth it. You risk losing your job just to be with me. And I know you wouldn't care if people will tell you that I'm not the one for you. And you wouldn't let anyone hurt me - or my daughter.

I can see that you love her; that you truly love her.

I want to be better than what and who I am right now, love. And I know that it will not always be pleasant, but I promise you that I will never ever let go. I've made a decision to spend the rest of my life with you. And no matter what they say and do, no matter what happens, I'll just be here.

A lifetime would not be enough to show you how much I love you.

Coming Soon

In a few days, it will be the anniversary of that text message I sent you. I couldn't believe that you replied. You were the only one who did. I was lonely, sad, and depressed. You made me smile despite that sad longing for a friend I lost a couple days before that.

After that, the rest is history. One day we were talking about typical UP politics, a year after, we were talking about our future.

I live for that day when we can finally come home to a place we both know we belong to. I've never felt such strong love for a person, until I met you.

Love, the road to our future may be paved with bad vibes, trials, and people who will pull us down and discourage us from getting there. But with a love this strong, we will make it. At the end of the day, it's you I always long for. It will be you I'll be loving until the world stops revolving.

You are my love, my life, and my destiny. I love you so much sweetie.

Dreaming of You

About a year ago, I was falling in love with this person who seemed too far away to reach.

Late at night when all the world is sleeping, I stay up and think of you. And I wish on a star that somewhere you are thinking of me too.

I never though he'd feel the same way as I did for him. Maybe it was because he didn't let his guard down and tried to tell me or show me how he felt at that time. Under the circumstances, it really wasn't the right time. Until the first date came, which was technically not really a date. It didn't really feel like a date. It felt more of like two new friends who were just hanging out, without the awkwardness.

Coz I'm dreaming of you tonight 'til tomorrow I'll be holding you tight. And there's nowhere in the world I's rather be than here in my room dreaming of you endlessly

Weeks passed by, my feelings for him grew, until I found myself falling helplessly in love with him. Though I knew that he knew that I liked him more than a friend would, the awkwardness never really came. We just felt comfortable in each other's company. I spent a lot of sleepless nights thinking of the possibility that we'd be together. The longing for him grew stronger as days passed by.

I just want to hold you close but so far, all I have are dreams of you. So I wait for the day to have the courage to say how much I love you.

Even as we went on our first official date, when we had our first kiss, I was still clueless about what he really felt for me. It was clear for me though that I was falling in love with me. Still, I remained unassuming, feeling like it was nothing, that that kiss was just a spur of the moment thing.

Late at night when all the world is sleeping, I stay up and think of you. And I still can't believe that you came up to me and said "I love you too"

That night was truly magical for me. I felt like I was never going to let go of him. It all felt like a dream and I didn't want to wake out. I heard the words, I saw it in his eyes, I felt it in his arms. Right then and there, I knew that I was never going to let go.

Now I'm dreaming with you tonight, 'til tomorrow and for all of my life. and there's nowhere in the world I'd rather be than here in my room dreaming with you endlessly.

I know that if I let go now, I will never ever feel this anymore; I'll never feel this joy and happiness anymore. I know that this will be worth the wait, this is worth the sacrifice, this will last a lifetime.

The Invitation

It doesn't interest me what you do for a living. I want to know what you ache for, and if you dare to dream of meeting your heart's longing.

It doesn't interest me how old you are. I want to know if you will risk looking like a fool for love, for your dream, for the adventure of being alive.

It doesn't interest me what planets are squaring your moon. I want to know if you have touched the center of your own sorrow, if you have been opened by life's betrayals or have become shriveled and closed from fear of further pain! I want to know if you can sit with pain, mine or your own, without moving to hide it or fade it, or fix it.

I want to know if you can be with joy, mine or your own, if you can dance with wildness and let the ecstasy fill you to the tips of your fingers and toes without cautioning us to be careful, to be realistic, to remember the limitations of being human.

It doesn't interest me if the story you are telling me is true. I want to know if you can disappoint another to be true to yourself; if you can bear the accusation of betrayal and not betray your own soul; if you can be faithless and therefore trustworthy.

I want to know if you can see beauty even when it's not pretty, every day, and if you can source your own life from its presence.

I want to know if you can live with failure, yours and mine, and still stand on the edge of the lake and shout to the silver of the full moon, "Yes!"

It doesn't interest me to know where you live or how much money you have. I want to know if you can get up, after the night of grief and despair, weary and bruised to the bone, and do what needs to be done to feed the children.

It doesn't interest me who you know or how you came to be here. I want to know if you will stand in the center of the fire with me and not shrink back.

It doesn't interest me where or what or with whom you have studied. I want to know what sustains you, from the inside, when all else falls away.

I want to know if you can be alone with yourself and truly like the company you keep in the empty moments.

- Oriah Mountain Dreamer

Thank You

You are the force that keeps me going, the hope that gives me strength, the love that keeps me alive. Thank you for keeping me sane when the world tries to be crazier than us. Thank you for loving me in a way no other individual has.

You are the love I never thought I wanted. Thank you.

My Heart Will Go On

I love you. I love your smile and the way you make me laugh. I love your sense of humor and the way you make me smile. I love your hands and the way you hold mine. I love your arms and the way you hold me close. I love your eyes and the way you look at me. I love your heart and the way you send shivers down my spine every time you tell me that you love me. I love your shirt and the way it clings to my skin. I'll make every part of you happy each single day.

Because you make me happy. So much.

This is for You

There are a million important things to do. But none as important as lying here next to you.

I'll understand your silence. Because sometimes, you'll have to understand mine.

You are a drop of perfect in an imperfect world. And all I need is a taste.

If our arms aren't strong enough, we'll rip the roof off with our hearts. If the road is dark, our dreams will light the way. If there isn't space in the back, we'll make space in our hopes. Pack a bag with everything you want to keep and leave the rest behind. Because I'm coming to pick you up.

We're a city of aliens. Pretending to be people we're not until we're comfortable enough with each other to be who we are. So only you know who I am.

I don't know if you felt that or not.
But it felt like two people kissing after hours of thinking about it.
It felt like two people talking after nights of silence.
It felt like two people touching after weeks of being numb.
It felt like two people facing each other after months of looking away.
It felt like two people in love after years of being alone.
It felt like two people meeting each other, after an entire lifetime of not meeting each other.

You and I collide, like atoms in a scientist's wet dreams. We could start a new universe together. We could mix like a disease. And if we do, I hope we never get better.

To wake up next to you. And confirm that the images I saw on the back of my eyelids seconds before, have all been made real.

Look at you, like a new tattoo. Because I might not always have you but I'll have the feeling of you for the rest of my life. (might not is the operative word. hehe)

That's why I love madness. It's easy to lose your mind when you lose your heart.

You and I, we're special because of each other. In spite of loneliness.


Love, the words may be borrowed, but the sentiment is all mine...

Crazier

When the world is just too much for me to bear,
when people around me try to be crazier than we are,
when life has taken its toll on me,

I just lie down in your arms and everything becomes alright.

Lost for Words

I'm still smiling, and it's all your fault. And you know that I've been having a difficulty smiling these days. You just made my day. You really are an angel, my angel.

For THE loved one

"We don’t have to be lovers in this lifetime. Just promise me I would be yours in another. Let’s fall in love before time has had its first forever,before infinite runs out of numbers, and before life ever knew of the word never."

Sonnet 17

I do not love you as if you were salt-rose, or topaz
or the arrows of carnations the fire shoots off.
I love you as certain dark things are to be loved,
in secret, between the shadow and the soul.

I love you as the plant that never blooms,
but carries in itself the light of hidden flowers;
thanks to your love a certain solid fragrance,
risen from the earth, lives darkly in my body.

I love you without knowing how, or when, or from where.
I love you straightforwardly, without complexities or pride;
so I love you because I know no other way

than this: where I does not exist, nor you,
so close that your hand on my chest in my hand,
so close that your eyes close as I fall asleep.